What Happens When Women Change the Game

When I was in grade school, I dreaded gym class because I hated the days when we played Red Rover. For those of you who never played, kids break up into two lines facing each other and holding hands to make a human chain. They then call someone from the opposing line to come over and try to break through their hand-held human chain. In grade school I was very thin, not too strong, and not too terribly athletic. I was also insecure and certainly not comfortable being powerful or the center of attention. Thus, I was often picked in Red Rover. “Red Rover, Red Rover, send Lisa right over.”

Since the goal was to try to break through, I would look for another skinny, non-athletic girl and try to break through where she was standing. It rarely worked, but it was certainly a better chance than trying to break through two tough-guy grade schoolers. The game was awful and I would walk away demoralized and also aware that the girls were being singled out for being weaker and less able to break through the human chain. For many years after that, I often felt that girls were pitted against each other.

Building a Support Team Makes for a Better Game

When I started my career, very few women were in leadership positions. Thus, the few that were seemed to always be competing with each other for that one token position for women. Maybe I’m imagining it, but it seemed that women were competing with each other for jobs, men, and societal respect. Red Rover, Red Rover, send a weak woman over. It was an equally demoralizing and discouraging time.

When women work together as a team instead of competing with each other, it's a win for everyone. #work #women #feminism #careers #solidarity Click To Tweet

Over the years, I worked harder to side with women, to find close, loyal friends, and to support other women in work and personal lives. I’ve seen so many other women doing the same thing. Our Red Rover teams feel stronger and more connected. When we call other women over, it isn’t to break through, but rather to join us. We are so much stronger and more powerful together. Now I look around and I see women standing up for each other, mentoring others and seeking to promote each other, both personally and professionally.

We’ve got a long way to go to get true equity in this world, yet I’m no longer scared of Red Rover because I know that the women who are calling me over, are my sisters. Red Rover, Red Rover, bring it on!

Love,

Lisa Kaplin Psy. D. PCC