Lately I’ve been talking to friends and clients in the over-40 crowd who are (for a variety of reasons) entering the dating scene. Most of these women haven’t dated since before the digital dating age. Needless to say, it’s a bit of a shock for these new online daters, so here are a few easy tips that might help make the transition a bit easier.
1. Work On Your Self-Confidence
Before you start dating again, you should work on your own self-confidence. Don’t date to fill a hole in your life, but rather date to enhance your life. There’s a big difference in both how you feel about yourself and the type of guy you are likely to attract.
Don't date to fill a hole in your life, but rather date to enhance your life. Click To Tweet2. Decide What You Want from Dating
Get some clarity about what you want from dating. Do you just want to meet some new people and have fun, or do you want a long-term relationship? There’s no right or wrong answer, but it will change how you set up your profile and the types of men you might want to date.
3. Get a Friend’s Help
Have a friend help you with your profile. Women are notoriously bad about promoting their good qualities; thus their profiles sound weak and without confidence. Use a natural photo that really looks like you. Wouldn’t you rather have men reach out based on the true you versus some unrealistic glamour shot?
Keep an open mind! Online dating is very popular, and there are many high-quality daters online. You may have a few unpleasant dates, but you may also meet some really wonderful men.
4. Pick a Reputable Site
Do your homework! There are lots of dating sites out there, and you want to pick a reputable one. Consider using this site to do some homework on many of the online dating sites. Also, here is a great breakdown of sites for daters over 50.
5. Try a Few Dates
Start slow by dating one or two people at first and keep the dates short. Think coffee or a cocktail but not a major meal right away. If it’s not a good fit, you can get out quickly. If it is a good fit, you can set up another date.
Welcome to a new and exciting dating world. It may be uncomfortable at first, but look at it as a grand adventure and a great way to meet some new people. The reason it is so popular is because it works so well and it’s a great way to overcome your fears of getting back into dating. Let me know how you do, and if you have tips for other women, please share them.
Love,
Lisa Kaplin Psy. D. PCC