As a life, leadership, and executive coach, I spend a lot of time talking to my clients about major life decisions. People tell me they can’t decide whether to stay in relationships, move locations, switch jobs, how to make certain parenting or caregiving decisions, and many other big and little decisions about their lives. What I know is that almost every single time, my clients have the answers and know what they want to do.
I’ll often push my clients to owning what they really want by having them picture removing any blocks to getting there. So I’ll say, “If money weren’t an issue, what would you do?” Or, “If no one would be unhappy with your decision, what would you decide?” Or, “If it’s impossible to make a mistake, what would you do now?” When I ask these questions, my clients ALWAYS know what they want. ALWAYS! Once they own their answer, the rest is pretty easy.
Knowing the answer doesn’t necessarily mean making that jump right in the moment, but rather it means fully owning one’s desires and then consciously choosing the steps to either get there or to choose a different path for now. Sometimes my clients want to leave their executive positions and lead a simpler life, yet they are financially responsible for themselves and others. Owning what they want and then finding ways to accomplish that, even if they don’t leave their career immediately, leads to greater happiness and ultimately the ability to choose their own emotional path.
Knowledge Is Power
Knowing the answer and owning it releases a tremendous emotional burden. Walking around with a feeling of powerlessness around our desires and our future is exhausting. We all have the power to own our desires, even if sometimes we can’t achieve those desires in the moment. I vividly remember feeling as if I didn’t have the answer to leaving my psychology practice and becoming a full-time coach. I was afraid to leave something that I knew. I felt guilty for having spent all of that time and money on my education only to choose a different path. I was worried about what my peers would think and about the judgment that others might cast on me for my choices.
What would you do with your life if nothing were standing in your way? How would it feel to own your desires and the power that comes with it? #LifeChoices #dreams #desires Click To TweetThe not knowing, or pretending that I didn’t know, weighed heavily on me. I didn’t fully make a decision for quite a while. Once I owned what I really wanted, the rest fell right into place. I realized that my education and experience as a psychologist only enhanced my coaching practice. My choice wasn’t necessarily one and not the other, but rather a wonderful collection of all of my life’s learning and experiences that I could bring to my current day business. I had let my own fear and concerns about what other’s might think keep me from what I knew I truly wanted. What a relief it was when I owned it all and started living in my own truth.
Owning our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors allows us to consciously move through life without the burden of not knowing or pretending we don’t know what we want. If you have a dilemma in your life, ask yourself what’s keeping you from owning the answer? What is the worst thing that can happen if you acknowledge what you really want? The power is in the knowing, and with that knowing comes action and decisions from a place of consciousness and acceptance.
Love,
Lisa Kaplin Psy. D. PCC