Father’s Day

This weekend is Father’s Day. I like this day because I enjoy honoring my wonderful father and my husband, the father of my children. I’ve been blessed with fabulous men in my life from my father, husband, brother, and loving uncles to mentors and educators who supported me and celebrated my success and achievements. Not all women are as lucky as I have been. Being raised by a kind, loving, emotionally aware man set me up for a life of looking for other similar male figures in my life.

My father was unique in his day for his hands on approach to fatherhood. He went to work all day and came home to be an active participant with his wife and two children. Today, that seems to be more common than not for young fathers and husbands. It’s a trend that I believe will be beneficial to our whole society. Traditional gender roles, particularly around parenting, weren’t particularly great for anybody. Mothers lost out on pursuing interests and financial independence outside of the home and fathers missed out on the joy of being highly involved in their children’s lives.

My heart fills with joy watching young fathers today who “wear” their babies in public and are equally as happy watching a dance recital as a baseball game. The young men I talk to out in the workforce want time off to be with their children. Many are looking for work-at-home options or part-time opportunities to satisfy their own work/life balance concerns. They are no longer satisfied with being the “babysitter” for their own children or the brunt of bad dad jokes that suggest they are ill equipped for the position.

Changing Gender Roles Are A Win for Families

Bringing more women into the workforce and more men into the career of child raising is a win for all of us, and most especially, future generations. Nurturing children is not dependent on gender and neither is running a Fortune 500 company. The concept of putting all of the financial demands of the family on one person was a dangerous proposition for most families. If that person lost his job or became disabled in some way, the burden was not easily transferred to a woman who wasn’t prepared or qualified to enter the workforce. Similarly, if all child raising was on the woman and something happened to her, fathers were often not prepared for the exhausting and demanding responsibility of raising children.

Raising young people to be both nurturing and prepared for work means a more well-rounded workforce and more caregivers for our next generation. So this weekend, when we honor the fathers in our lives, let’s honor them for the way they love their children every bit as much as we honor them for the hard work they do outside of the home. My father was a successful engineer, but in my humble opinion his greatest success is in the love he gives our family. I feel the same way about my husband and his relationship with our three children.

Happy Father’s day to all of the wonderful dads in your life, and most especially the ones who see raising children as one of the most important jobs they will ever hold.

Love,

Lisa Kaplin Psy. D. PCC