Recently, I was preparing for a truly busy week. My husband and daughter both had birthdays to celebrate. We were having a going away party for my oldest son who was leaving for a job overseas. It was parent orientation at the high school. A dear friend was having a 50th birthday party. And I was giving a 3-day program on women’s assertiveness, with the other two days filled with client sessions. As I was thinking ahead to the week, I heard myself say, “Things will be better when this week is over.”
What was wrong with me?
Things will be better? Seriously? What could be better than a week of celebrations and work that makes me deliriously happy? What was wrong with me to be looking forward to such a fabulous week being over? I realized that although these were all events that I love, I was nervous about the intensity and the busyness of the week. I was actually dreading the good stuff.
Had I stayed in that mindset, I would have tolerated a fabulous week. I would have checked off each event and taken a deep breath to get through the rest of it. It would have been no different than checking doctor’s appointments off my list. Get it done, move on. There was no conscious awareness on my part that I wasn’t present for the good stuff, but rather pushing through in order to get to the next week.
I made a huge mindshift.
After I made this awareness, I made a huge mindshift to, “This is going to be a FABULOUS week! I’m going to be present and enjoy every last minute of it. If I’m a bit tired, oh well. It will have been worth it.” And that’s exactly what I did, I enjoyed every wonderful moment of that week. I celebrated the birthdays. I hosted friends for the going away party for my son. And I dove into my assertiveness talk with outrageous energy and motivation.
My clients got the absolute best of me because I was fully present, excited to see them, and certainly not clicking off the time until our meetings ended. I gave that week and the people in it a full YES and ended the week with energy and gratitude. Now I watch myself carefully for any thoughts of, “Let’s just get this week over with.” Those thoughts didn’t allow me to enjoy the good stuff. Instead, they pushed me to dread the time that is the best of my life.
Life is too short to dread the good stuff.
I’m aware now and change my thoughts from, “This will be a tough/busy week.” to “This is going to be a wonderful week filled with all of the things that I love to do and people that I love to spend time with.” Life is too short to dread the good stuff and I’m not going to let myself do that anymore. Tough or sad days will still happen, but I’ll deal with them when I get there. In the meantime, I can’t wait for the good stuff!
Love,
Lisa Kaplin Psy. D. PCC
Don’t Let Stress Control Your Life
Stress is literally killing us. It is physically debilitating, emotionally exhausting, and a true relationship destroyer. Much of the common stress reduction advice is superficial and at best a Band-Aid. Lisa’s tried and true approach to permanent stress reduction has changed many of her client’s lives. She teaches you the exact steps you need to take to reduce stress for good regardless of the chaos around you.- When you know how to reduce the stress in your life and your reaction to it, you will be filled with happiness and relief.
- You will no longer fear stressful situations or how you will feel when you confront them.
- Without all of that stress your relationships will improve, you will be more productive, and filled with amazing energy.