Pure Joy and Elation
When I was getting my psychology degree I learned about Abraham Mazlow’s concept of peak experiences. Mazlow described peak experiences as transcendent moments of pure joy and elation. It was one of my favorite psychological concepts though admittedly at that time I wasn’t sure that I really understood what Mazlow meant. Since becoming a mother, wife, and a bit more mature, I’ve come to appreciate Mazlow’s peak experiences even more than I could have known at the time.
When my children were born many people gave me the advice of enjoying every moment of motherhood because time goes so quickly. Time does go quickly now but it certainly didn’t when I was up all night with colicky babies. The thing about appreciating every moment is that you’d have to literally stop every moment to notice and enjoy it. I’m pretty sure that you couldn’t really get much done nor would the peak moments really seem peak if you were focusing on every single moment.
Relax and Look Forward to the Special Moments
That’s why Mazlow’s theory is so wonderful. Since not every moment can really be peak, you can relax and look forward to the ones that are truly special. Here’s the other interesting thing about this concept, the moment is up to you in that you allow it to happen, you don’t manufacture it. So maybe it’s when you are simply sitting in a room with your family and a sense of peace and joy fill you up. It can be on a bike ride or reading a book or cuddling with your partner. It can also be a big moment like your wedding day or the birth of your children.
To me these are the moments that draw the picture of a life well lived. They are the moments that fill us up, bring us joy, and stay in our memory for our whole lives. Yet you can’t have those moments if you don’t put your stress, fear, and anxiety aside. I know that isn’t so easy to do. It takes work but that work is well worth it in order to allow you to enjoy your life and your loved ones. Watch for those moments in which you feel your soul sing and the feeling of contentment envelopes you. Be present in that moment, recognize it and revel in it. They are the moments that will sustain you through the hard times that we inevitably face.
Here’s wishing you many peak experiences throughout your whole life.
Love,
Lisa Kaplin Psy. D. PCC