During a recent coaching session with one of my amazing clients, I asked her how true the story she was telling herself really was. She paused and said, “It’s true in my mind.”
I stopped for a moment—because that answer is so wise and brilliant. From the outside, it can feel simple: just stop telling yourself that story. But of course, if it were that easy, we’d all have changed our stories already.
Many of us tell ourselves stories about our failures, our shortcomings, or our supposed limitations so long that they feel like absolute truth. “I’m too old. Too inexperienced. Too unworthy. Too flawed.” And our minds, powerful and convincing as they are, make us look for evidence that these stories are true. The tricky part? We live the story we tell ourselves. If your mind is telling you something negative, your thoughts, actions, and even your energy will align with that story.
But here’s the good news: if a story can feel true, so can a new one. The same mind that has convinced you of your limitations can also remind you of your strength. That same mind that points out flaws can also show you your gifts.
How to Rewrite Your Story:
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Recognize it. Start by seeing the old story for what it is—a story. Notice it without judgment. Be curious about how it got there. This step is about awareness, not shame.
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Understand it. Ask yourself where this story came from and why it may have helped you in the past. Often, it protected you, kept you safe, or helped you survive. But now? It may be holding you back from the life you want to live.
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Choose a new story. This is the magic step. You get to decide what story you want to live by. And yes, it takes repetition. Tell it over and over again until it begins to feel like your new reality.
Your new story might sound like:
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“I am capable, smart, and valuable.”
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“I am enough, just as I am.”
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“My worth is not defined by my appearance, but by my actions, heart, and impact.”
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“I am resilient, and I learn and grow from every experience.”
Making Your New Story Real
You might be thinking, “Oh, here comes the positive thinking stuff.” And I get it—you might roll your eyes or feel skeptical. But consider this: if you can tell yourself a false, limiting story every day without realizing it, why can’t you tell yourself a true, empowering one instead?
Even if you don’t believe it at first, living it changes everything. Confidence leads to action. Action leads to more confidence. Positive actions create positive momentum, which reinforces your new story. The same way a negative story creates patterns that hold you back, a positive story creates patterns that propel you forward.
Here’s the thing: you’ve been telling stories your entire life. Your mind is always narrating. Why not make this one the story that motivates you, inspires you, and helps you become the person you most want to be? Why not let it be the story that shapes your reality rather than limits it?
Your Invitation:
Start today. Write your new story. Speak it aloud, journal it, repeat it in moments of doubt. Practice it until it feels familiar. Live as if it’s already true. Let your actions, your choices, and your energy align with the story you want to be living.
You get to choose your story. You get to decide what you believe about yourself and the life you can create. And I promise you—when you start living your new story, your mind, your heart, and your life will begin to follow.
You’ve been telling stories anyway—why not make this one incredible?
Love,
Certified Professional Coach and Psychologist
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How often have you wished for that person in your life who listens deeply, doesn’t judge you, and doesn’t try to fix you? That person who holds space for you to talk through your struggles, your hopes, and dreams so that you can live the personal and professional life that you truly want? I’m that person. Yes, I’m a psychologist and a professional life and leadership coach but my superpower is listening, deep, empathic, compassionate listening. If you’ve been seeking a professional listener who will help you live the life you truly desire, let’s set up a time to talk. My email is Lisa@LisaKaplin.com.