I work with many executive-level women and a common theme I hear from them is the struggle to claim and own their space as leaders, both personally and professionally. Recently, I asked a group of these women if they struggled to own space due to external factors or internal factors. In other words, were others keeping them from owning the space or were they somehow holding themselves back from that space. Their answers were a resounding, BOTH!
All of the women I have worked with have faced some form of sexism in which they were treated as less than, they weren’t listened to, they were talked over, their ideas weren’t taken seriously, etc. They were exhausted from having to manage themselves regarding these external forces. It’s like having to do double the work by having to manage the sexism AND actually do the work. It seems most of these women ran into the same issues at home. No wonder women are so burned out!
What these women also suggested is that sometimes they tell themselves they are not worthy of the leadership space. They are not smart enough, strong enough, or ready enough for that space. Intellectually they realize it isn’t true, but it feels that way to them in the moment. Many of them have been emotionally beat down by others and thus struggle to release those voices and come to the table confident and sure of themselves.
Overcoming The Forces That Hold Us Back
So, we are struggling to own our space due to external and internal forces. I’m often asked how to change these forces. It’s not always an easy process. First, believe that space is yours. Truly believe it. Then own it. Live in that leadership space even if some people don’t like you or are intimidated by you. We can’t own our space by waiting for the opportunity to own it. We need to go out and get it.
Women, know your worth and own your space. Live in your leadership space even if some people don't like it. #leadership #work #selfesteem #confidence #sexism Click To TweetWhat space do you want? What’s keeping you from getting it? Think it through and then come up with a strategy of how you are going to OWN that space. No one is going to do this job for you. You are going to have to believe it and go get it. It takes courage and support, so figure out how you are going to get both and then get out there and own the space that is rightfully yours. While you are there, help other women get to that space as well!
Love,
Lisa Kaplin Psy. D. PCC