This Saturday, my oldest child is getting married. In my mind he’s still a toddler, which might make the wedding pictures kind of awkward. But still, that’s how I often think of him. As every parent often says, “It went so fast.” And it did. I have glimpses of memories of an adorable chatty toddler, a quiet teen-ager, and now a wise and kind young man. I’m overcome with emotion when I think of him as a husband and maybe someday a father. I’m filled with joy as he enters this stage of adulthood.

It isn’t that I believe that marriage is a necessary stage of adulthood. I don’t. I know that marriage, or even highly committed relationships, are not for everyone. Yet a committed relationship is clearly something that my son desires and I’m happy for him that he has found his person. Mostly, I’m happy that he has found someone that he wants to share his life with. As a mother, it brings me great comfort to know that someone else loves him and will look after my boy and he will look after his future wife as well.

Life can be challenging and having a supportive partner by one’s side can be comforting and joyful. Also, as any married person will tell you, it’s also extremely challenging on any given day! I look forward to watching my son and his wife navigate those waters and hope that their generation improves on marriage and partnership. 

When a child gets married their parent is joyful to know someone will love and care for them as they did. #parenting #weddings #marriage Click To Tweet

When I held my son for the very first time, I whispered the names of all of the people that already loved him. I cried as I whispered his father and I, his grandparents, cousin, aunt, uncles, and even beloved great grandparents. I didn’t know at the time that he would also have two siblings, more cousins, and wonderful friends who also love him, but I whispered the possibility of all of those relationships into my baby’s ear. I wanted him to feel loved from the moment he entered the world and every day thereafter. 

On that day in 1993, I also whispered the possibility of a true love who might be at his side through all of the experiences that life has to offer. On Saturday, that possibility will be the beautiful young woman that he has chosen to be his wife. My imagination on the day of my son’s birth didn’t do justice to the reality of my future daughter-in-law. She is far better than any hopeful vision that I had. I’m not sure if she pictured our crazy family as in-laws, but for better or worse, that’s who she is getting!

If I’m given permission to do so, I will share some pictures with all of you in the near future. Now I’m off to find waterproof mascara for the big day!

Love,

Lisa Kaplin Psy. D. CPC

Lisa Kaplin Psy. D. PCC

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