My youngest child started college a few weeks ago. I’ve heard so many adults say, “Enjoy it. Those are the best years of your life.” Although my college years were particularly fantastic, it wouldn’t say much about the rest of my life if those were the best years. What would that mean about my married life, my time as a parent, and my career? And more importantly, if that were the case, why wouldn’t I have done something to enjoy the rest of my life as much as I did those years?
I want all of my kids to enjoy college, but I really want them to enjoy life. If they don’t love their career, I want them to either figure out a way to enjoy it or find a new career. If they haven’t found the right partner in life, I want them to challenge their own expectations and values and find a partner to share their life with. If parenthood is what they choose, I hope they choose it with eyes wide open and the awareness that every day won’t be perfect, but there will be perfection in every day with kids.
Why is it so easy for so many of us to discount most of our adult lives in favor of four fun but limited years of education and parties? Why can’t we keep learning and keep partying? Okay, well maybe not partying to the extent that some of us did in college, but still having fun and enjoying the company of others. I’m still friends with my college group. When we get together, we act pretty similarly to the way we did in college. We just get tired sooner!
Why is it so easy for so many of us to discount most of our adult lives in favor of four fun but limited years of education and parties? #college #happiness #responsibility #parenting Click To TweetI’ll admit that the lack of much responsibility was very nice in college. The extra free time was pretty great too. What if we changed how we looked at responsibility so that it didn’t feel so burdensome? What if we saw responsibility as a gift and something to be grateful for? I’m responsible for showing up to work and doing a good job. I’m grateful to have both the education and job to do that. I’m grateful for the opportunity to contribute to my family financially and thus, that responsibility is a true blessing.
As far as the free time goes, are you sure you won’t be a bit bored? Maybe I’ll try it and report back. In the meantime, the best days of my life are the days in which I am alive, healthy, and grateful for all I have. Today would be one of those wonderful days.
Love,
Lisa Kaplin Psy. D. PCC